What women need from a man
Woman of 40-plus are strong, independent and confident. They know what they want, and they know what they can do without. Mature women have been through relationships and marriage, some of them bad, some good; they've had children, they know what turns them on and makes them happy.
Self-confidence
It doesn't matter whether you're a mail carrier or a company director, women like a man who's comfortable in his own skin. They don't want a guy who's insecure or pretends to be someone he isn't.
Self-confidence is a turn-on in bed, too. Mature women love a man who knows what he wants and is comfortable asking for it. A man should know how to please a woman. He should be aware of what turns her on, and if he doesn't know, he shouldn't be shy about finding out.
Financially secure and his life in order
Women don't want a man whose financial affairs are a mess. You don't have to be rich but you should be making regular money, pay your bills on time, file your taxes when they're due, and not be on the run from debt collectors.
Women do not want a man who can't pay his cell phone bill, or who lacks the cash to repair his car. Keep your finances and personal life in good working order.
No BS
Don't pretend you drive a BMW when you drive a Taurus; don't say you make 200 grand a year when you make 20. Don't try to fool your woman into believing you are the verge of a big break when you know it is not going to happen.
If you have any issues, for example depression, impatience, or you're a workaholic, let her know in advance. Women will accept faults in a man if he is open and honest about them.
White people are so used to being in the majority that they simply cannot relax when they're outnumbered. They don't know the rules, they don't know what they're supposed, or allowed, to do. The behavior they're used to, so-called normal behavior, is suddenly not so normal, and they're stuck and anxious.
Don't tell stories that over-inflate your importance, power, income, sexual prowess. It's a huge turn off when the facts don't match the talk. It is much better to show a woman you are content with life, are balanced, and honest. Even if BS gives you some short term gains, it does not work long term.
Takes care of his body and has good personal hygiene
Women desire men who take care of themselves. It doesn't matter how you do it, whether you run, lift weights or paddle a canoe, but if you want to attract a desirable woman, you should stay in shape. There's no need to be vain about it, don't spend time admiring yourself in mirrors, don't fish for praise, but let your trim body and toned muscles do the talking.
Show your woman you care about your appearance. This doesn't mean you have to spend a fortune on the latest fashions, but you must be well groomed.
It is amazing how many men let their women, and themselves, down by not using deodorant, by not monitoring whether their breath is fresh before sex. A woman does not want you to smell like a locker room at the Y. Nor does she want to smell yesterday's tacos on your breath as you push close to kiss her.
Is kind and caring to his own and his lover's children
Women are incredibly loyal and loving toward their children. Never try to come between a mom and her kids. Don't criticize her way of raising her children and do not make negative remarks about her kids, even if you think they're rude, run wild, and completely lack manners and discipline.
You can melt a woman's heart by taking part in activities with her kids. Find out what her kids enjoy doing and get involved. If the kids want you to take part, don't be bashful but pitch that baseball, go to the movie theater and watch animated films with them, visit Six Flags, be a good sport at Wii Games.
Always encourage your lover's kids. Tell her she is doing a great job. Don't be too boastful, and never humiliate or upset her kids. Don't destroy her kids' confidence by showing them you are better at everything the kids like.
Allow kids to excel, even if that means you have to lose now and again. The simple rule is "Lift children up, never knock them down". Be a positive influence in a child's life, be a role model.
Is a good listener
Many men bore women to tears by talking about themselves all the time. Don't act as though a woman's role is simply to keep your ego inflated. Male stories that revolve solely around guy stuff are of little interest to a woman. If a woman likes you, she will be too polite to say that your fanatical interest in baseball and beer makes her eyes glaze over and has her wondering when you're going to shut up. Instead of doing all the talking, listen and take an interest when your woman talks about things that interest her.
Remember, not every woman is fired up about shopping and hanging out at the mall. If your woman wants to watch a chick flick that is of no interest to you, don't steamroller her into watching a mindless action flick, watch her movie instead, even if it's 'Sex and The City'. If she's into fitness, find out whether she'd like you to attend gym sessions, or at least offer to drive her there and listen closely when she talks about how awesome the session was.
Make your woman feel special and attractive
Your woman does not want to feel as though you'd rather she was 20 years younger and 20 pounds lighter. Love her for who she is. If you want to make remarks about her weight or appearance, be positive and encouraging about it -- and be extremely sensitive. No woman wants to feel as though she is too fat or too old.
Don't say stupid, insensitive things like "You'd look great if you lost a few pounds" or "You look fantastic for your age". And don't talk about other women you find attractive. Don't tell your lover about the young secretary at work who wears tight outfits and has long, slim legs. How would you feel if she told you she'd like you more if you looked like Brad Pitt or had a firmer butt?
When your woman is looking good, tell her so. Compliment her on her outfits and appearance. If she has changed her hairstyle, let her know you've noticed. If she is excited about a new pair of shoes, try to take an interest in them, even if it's only a cursory glance and a few questions about the brand and where she bought them.
When you are out in public with an older woman, don't let your gaze wonder to younger women. Don't have that dumb, drooling puppy look when see a woman you like. Keep your eyes and attention on the woman you are with. She has paid you the courtesy of being with you, so be present for her, notice her, be engaged by her company.
Follow these seven simple steps and you will find it much easier to attract and keep a woman. Once a woman is interested in you, she will be loving and loyal. Your commitment to her will be returned and rewarded many times over.
Readers respond
Gary, Aurora, Illinois Believe me, women want one thing from a man: money. In my experience, and I have been married three times, that's all the need a guy to give them.
Sheila, San Francisco A woman needs to man to make her feel safe and attractive. Women are incredibly loyal. If a woman feels secure with a man, and if she feels he desires her, she will stay with him no matter what.
Naomi, Wheeler Your article is accurate. Personal hygiene palys a big role in a relationship. If a man can't keep himself clean and smelling nice, it means he can't look after himself, you, or business.
Peter, Portsmouth, England This seems to be written for American women, the most demanding on earth. I was married to an American woman for six years and she wanted to analyze our every move. She couldn't just relax and enjoy life.
Gloria, Madison Wonderful article. It covers the range of a woman's needs if a man is going to make her happy. No woman will ever be given all seven things from a man, but if he can deliver on five of the seven she is doing well.